Delighting In differences
So yes my hubby and I are polar opposites; a classic opposites attract story. Then, add the obvious male vs female differences and that takes you to “Learning Curve Avenue” on the journey called newlywed life. We came to see quickly within our marriage that our modes of operation, thoughts, emotions, and processes were different and purposely designed so. At one point as a newlywed, our differences seemed to be highlighted, which caused tension, but over time we have learned to delight in our differences, knowing that our uniqueness brought out the best in us both. Notice I said overtime, because It’s not always easy to delight in a difference that may be conflicting with your preferred mode of operation.
During our first years of marriage our differences seemed to be magnified, and all we could see were the faults in each other, but the beauty of God’s plan in marriage is that he uses our differences to teach us how to extend grace and demonstrate it toward one another. Differences can work for your marriage rather than against it, if you put in the time to put yourself “in your spouse’s shoes” in order to better understand them . You can practice this by intentionally making an effort to appreciate their personality, understand their ideologies, and discuss the expectations that they brought into marriage during the blending process. It doesn’t mean that you should think negatively of your own viewpoint and who God created you to be, it just means that you get an opportunity to learn to see things through another set of eyes.
When you’re dating, the core of the relationship is focused on enjoyment, fun, and making sure the other person meets all of your requirements to be suitable for marriage. So now within confines of marriage you still get to have fun, however your differences now have to blend together to create a new symmetry. I used to think, as a newlywed, “Why are we so different”, yet when we were dating his differences were the sexiest thing to me. His differences stimulated my mind and I just couldn’t get enough of it, but then somewhere within marriage we ended up wanting it our own way! Differences in marriage are very purposeful and they usually aid in illuminating an area you have never before explored. Don’t be afraid of the exploration; it stimulates growth and appreciation for your spouse.
God knew that putting two great differences together creates a wonderful unit. Differences help refine you into a great individual and compliments your life. So remember, differences make you a triple threat, a “dynamite dynamic duo”! Keep growing and exploring a new delightful differences in your marriage today. It’s ALL FOR A PURPOSE!
Enjoy who you are and celebrate the differences in one another!
Differences make your marriage SPICEY!